Emotional

It's been an EMOTIONAL two days.
The kind of emotional when you really doubt you'll be ok in the end.. I'm still questioning it.
I don't handle abandonment well. At all.
It's the deepest form of pain for me.. To be left behind.
To have someone willingly turn their back on me.. It cuts deep. Very deep.
I've lost someone whom I held CLOSE to my heart.. Not even close, but IN my heart.
The kind of person who you feel so comfortable with, trust so deeply and care so much about that they become a part of your heart.. I've lost that person.
And the hardest thing about it.. they left without explanation.
It leaves me questioning myself..
To go from someone who was introduced as their best female friend, to someone who doesn't even exist in their world.
The pain.. it becomes more than a mental state of mind..
I feel it on every level of my existence.
Abandonment..
I have to heal my heart and accept the fact that they have left me.
Things like this always takes me forever.. But I've done it before, and I'll do it again.
I just hope this doesn't scare me off from opening up and trusting people in the future.
Despite all this, and no matter what happens.. I will never have a bad word to say about you.
When someone asks about you I will simply smile and be grateful for the friendship that you showed me and for the unbelievable kind person that you are.
Never doubt that. Ever.
Thank You